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Pilot Writer’s Diary Exercises

May 30, 2018

The stranger approached him and whispered … the secret to happiness, but he had his earphones in and missed it.

The sound of his voice made her … want to grab his pen and stab him repeatedly in the larynx.

Mary had everything she wanted, except … a job, a place to live, enough food, and someone to love; she had a pram full of curry cartons, and that made up for a lot.

Today I will say yes to … the checkout person who asks if I have a Flybuys card, just to see what happens next.

My worst fashion moment was … one Wednesday when my pants went out of style at 8.45am, too late to go home and change.

The table started to shake and … I knew for certain that parking our caravan on a construction site had been a mistake.

If I were immortal for one day I would … probably be unaware of it, unless I got hit by a bus or something.

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Another Paint Swatch Poem

May 16, 2018

Sweet illusion of security

Déjà vu is just recycled foresight

It’s all fun and games till someone loses.

Who will it be?

Grey knight, pretty lady,

Frivolous daredevil artiste diva

Mystification, mysteria.

My calm-day male

Has our valentine

Energy peaked?

This is my most private tone

my signature:

Frail pink. A wiggle of indecision.

Déjà vu turns up again, the terrain

I never wished to see again

This sinful wilderness

This tender kiss

Clinton Blue is the colour of my dress.

Voice

September 15, 2017

Today we’re going to experiment with personal pronouns. As you work through this exercise, notice how altering these changes the tone of your writing.

SCAN_20170915_104426656

Find a picture of a stranger. Now write something (approx 2-4 paragraphs) from that character’s point of view, in first person (“I”, “me”). 

I’m the best in my ballay class. Mums always telling me not to go around saying that, but its true. I know its true becorze I herd Mrs Deaken say it to Mum when she was pikking me up after class one time. Mrs Deaken is my ballay teacher.

You shoodnt have been lissening is what Mum says when I say this, which is dum becorze they were talking rite in front off me. But Mum says it was still a privatt grownups convosayshun because they were torking in soft low voyces so the other girls woodnt hear.

Mum says the other girls will get discurraged if they think Im better than them. But I say its ovbious anyway becorze I allways get pikked for the leed rolls in our resitals. Then Mum sies and says if I go around bragging I wont have any frends.

little girl yellow dress

 

Now rewrite the passage, still from the character’s point of view, but in second person (“you”). 

You’re the best in your ballet class. Your mum’s always telling you not to go around saying that, but you know it’s true because you heard Mrs Deaken, your ballet teacher, say it to your mum one time when she was picking you up after class.

Your mum says you shouldn’t have been listening, which you think is dumb because they were talking right in front of you. But your mum says it was still a private, grown-ups’ conversation, because they were talking softly so the other girls wouldn’t hear.

She says that the other girls will get discouraged if they think you’re better than them, but you say it’s obvious anyway, because you always get picked for the leads in the recitals. Then your mum sighs and says if you go around bragging then you won’t have any friends.

little girl green dress

 

Now write the same passage, still from the character’s point of view, but in third person, and in a different tense; if you wrote the two first passages in present tense, switch to past tense, or vice versa. 

Jacinta was the best in her ballet class. Her mum was always telling her not to go around saying that, but she knew it was true because she’d heard Mrs Deaken, her ballet teacher, tell Mum when she was picking her up after class.

“You shouldn’t have been listening,” Mum said, when Jacinta brought it up in the car on the way home.
“That’s dumb. You were talking right in front of me.”
“Don’t be rude. It was still a private, grown-ups’ conversation. You’re old enough to know the difference.”
“How?”
“We were talking in soft, low voices, so the other girls wouldn’t hear. They’ll get discouraged if they think you’re better than they are.”
“But they all know anyway. Mrs Deaken always picks me for the lead parts in the recitals. It’s ovbious.”

Mum sighed, but Jacinta could see in the rear-view mirror that she was trying not to smile. “Just don’t go around bragging about it. You won’t have any friends if you do.”

little girl red dress

 

 

 

 

Short Film Fundraiser: Bachelor Auction

August 13, 2017

Don’t miss this fundraiser with a difference! All proceeds go to the pickup shoot to complete my first short film/mini-webseries, Keep Me In Mind.

KMIM Bachelor Auction Poster

 

Check out our Facebook page to meet our bachelors!

 

Limericks

August 11, 2017
tags:

I’m encouraging my class to develop their skills creating  consistent metre and rhythm in poetry. We started with one of the simplest poetic forms – the limerick.  
I confined myself to suburbs in my home town of Melbourne. 

A certain composer from Coburg
Desired to see a real iceberg.
She sailed the Atlantic
Till she was so frantic
Her concertos resembled Schoenberg.

A certain young lady from Brunswick
Made puns till her husband was pun-sick
He cried, “Please desist
Or you’ll no more be kissed
For this knot we have tied I will unpick.”

 

 

 

 

 

New VODville sketch by me!

August 10, 2017

The first sketch I’ve both written and directed for VODville is out now.

If you’ve ever been sat next to a manspreader on the tram/bus/train, seething with irritation as your arse-cheek slid off the seat, you’ll love this.

I’m a sketch comedy writer now!

June 22, 2017

I’ve recently started writing material for comedy sketch channel VODville, created by Maddy Butler. 

See my debut here, catch up on all VODville’s excellent previous sketches at
http://vodville.tv/ and keep checking their Facebook page  for more comedy gold –  a
 new sketch every fortnight! 
Still_Adopt a Tiger_VODville

Michaelle Muir and Meerna Yousif in ‘Adopt a Tiger’ by Mileta Rien